A story I read over a decade earlier has stayed with me. It was probably related to the Harvard Study on Adult Development, which studied a group men over their lives. However, I cannot find the reference. After retiring, a much-loved doctor was presented with a notebook of letters from patients expressing their gratitude and praise. He put the notebook in his attic and never read or opened any of the letters.
Since I first heard this story, I have often wondered what motivated the doctor to behave in that way. I also wonder why praise can make us feel good but can also make others feel uncomfortable.
Christopher Littlefield is a consultant and speaker who specializes on employee appreciation. In this episode, we try to answer the question. We first discuss the importance of recognition. Then we explore why we are so reluctant to give compliments. Finally, we look at how we can make compliments more effective. Then we discuss why receiving compliments makes you cringe. We also explore how people can deflect compliments and how that affects their relationships. Finally, we look at how to receive compliments more graciously.
Podcast Resources
Sunday Firesides: Compliment Denial is Gift DenialSunday firesides: Give them the CreamHBR article: Do Compliments Make you Cringe Sunday Firesides: Compliment Deflection Is Gift DenialSunday Firesides: Give Them the CreamHBR Article: Do Compliments Make You Cringe?Christopher Littlefield: Connect with him
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